Not Afraid...

love Love LOVE IT...

and was I when Eminem got hot?  Damn, you look away for a minute...

Just fighting demons. Don't mind me.

Lately, I do it a lot with this song.  A friend turned me on to Pink not too long ago.  Some of her stuff speaks to me.  This one in particular at the moment.  I've posted a video of it, several times, several places.  I'm not a big fan of the real one, I post a different one, not because it isn't a good video, it's awesome.  It just hits closer to home than I like right now.

Truth of it all is, cute little baby blogger Amara is rather... bent.  I won't call it broken.  I'll just call it... bent.

I'm just fighting demons tonight.  Don't mind me.

Fucking Perfect by Pink...

Made a wrong turn, once or twice 
Dug my way out, blood and fire 
Bad decisions, that's alright 
Welcome to my silly life 
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood 
Miss 'No way, it's all good', it didn't slow me down 
Mistaken, always second guessing, underestimated 
Look, I'm still around 

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel 
Like you're less than f*ckin' perfect 
Pretty pretty please, if you ever ever feel like you're nothing 
You're f*ckin' perfect to me! 

You're so mean, when you talk about yourself, you were wrong 
Change the voices in your head, make them like you instead 
So complicated, look happy, you'll make it! 
Filled with so much hatred...such a tired game 
It's enough! I've done all I can think of 
Chased down all my demons, I've seen you do the same 

Oh, pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel 
Like you're less than f*ckin' perfect 
Pretty pretty please, if you ever ever feel like you're nothing 
You're f*ckin' perfect to me 

The whole world's scared so I swallow the fear 
The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer 
So cool in line, and we try try try, but we try too hard and it's a waste of my time 
Done looking for the critics, cause they're everywhere 
They dont like my jeans, they don't get my hair 
Exchange ourselves, and we do it all the time 
Why do we do that? Why do I do that? 

Why do I do that..? 

Yeah, oh, oh baby, pretty baby..! 
Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel 
Like you're less than f*ckin' perfect 
Pretty pretty please, if you ever ever feel 
Like you're nothing, you're f*cking perfect to me 
You're perfect, you're perfect! 
Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel 
Like you're less than f*ckin' perfect 
Pretty please, if you ever feel like you're nothing 
You are perfect to me....

Zoo kids: the saga continues

Asleep in front of the fire

Oh, my little zoo kids, the saga continues.

It's been about 3 weeks since Mr. Tuxedo kitty Loki came home.  He's doing great, fitting right in.  That would be my little sprawler dude stretched out in front of the fire where I found him sleeping the other night.  He's so weird.  

Coolest little dude ever.

He has caught, or run off, all the little nasty mice in the place.  He totally rocks at the mouser kitty thing.  Haven't had a single mouse sighting or even a sound for a couple weeks now.  Go Loki Go.  He's my good boy, saves me from all those nasty rodents, even the icky spiders too. =)

Poor little dude had to go to the vet again today, poor guy really wasn't doing so hot when I got him.  Serious case of the ear mites that the shelter didn't quite get fixed all the way, and he needed himz shots too.  My poor dude's not feeling too well tonight, he's all curled up next to me snoozing away.  Lucky for my wallet, I think we're done with the vet for awhile.  Now I know why he was so cheap at the shelter, seems I've got a clearance kitty to go with the clearance puppy I got all those years ago.  

All my little problem zoo kids.

He does seem to be doing better.  He's putting on some weight already, the sores behind his ears are all healed up and his fur isn't falling out like it was either.  Bonus all that.

Holly dog is hanging in there pretty good.  Still jealous has hell over Loki, who exploits it of course.  

Most of her wounds are healed up, so I tried to give her a good brushing.  Poor thing hasn't been able to be brushed since the attack and is just one giant matted mess.  It's going to take many a brushin' to get that mess sorted out, but I still can't get too aggressive with the whole deal since her throat is still not totally better yet.  But she's coming along, which is so much more than the vet expected.  Yay for that.

I was all ready to post a pic of my newest zoo kid spot, the catfish.  Unfortunately... he died yesterday.  Poor spot.  Just dropped dead away.  Pretty sure I killed the poor little dude.  Sorry spot.

The other fishies, Bodhi and Gillie are growing like weeds, friggin leviathans in there.  And yeah me, the bom chicka wah wah fishies have not spawned me a school yet.  yaaaaaay.

That's about it.  Life with the zoo kids.  Loki is telling me I must stop playing computer now, as demonstrated by his attempts to crawl up on the keyboard.  Last time the little shit did that, he shut it down completely, so... time to go, he would like to be pet now.

He so owns me.

Later taters. =)

Oh yeah...

... sometimes... that.

Just sayin'

Mistress of the Tool Belt

I have come to a few conclusions this weekend.  Bottom line… I need to quit screwing off so much.  I can't keep hiding from real life by playing on FB.

I’ve been avoiding waaaay to many things the last few months.  Important things.  Things out here in the real world, as well as things I should be doing on my blog.  It’s time to buckle down.  It’s time to also get off the social network sites.  It’s time to get serious.

I started stepping back this weekend, closed the FB some, and got busy.  I actually managed to get quite a bit accomplished too.  Even did it while really sick.  Truthfully… I’m all kinds of proud of myself.

I managed to get some neglected things taken care of around the house.  Cleaned up some, split some kindling, cleaned out the wood stove, brushed the poor dog who is matted beyond belief (first brushing since the attack, poor girl is a mess), gave the fish tank a good scrubbing...happy zoo kids all around.  Got the tools out and managed to actually figure out how to fix my broken sliding glass door, front door too.  Pretty damn proud of myself for that.  Successfully slingin’ the tools… oh yeah.  I’m pleased.  Pleased enough, I have now dubbed myself… Mistress of the tool belt. 

Oh yeah.  Oh yeah.

Today, I closed the FB again, and blogged.  Managed to get almost an entire week scheduled out… while sleeping most of the day away with a screaming headache even. 

Not bad.

I like ending the weekend with an actual list of things accomplished.  Feels good.  Been awhile since I could say that.

Yeah.  Time to step back from the FB and buckle down.  I’ve got about 1000 other things to still take care of, and a blog to make awesome. 

So here’s me… turning over a new leaf.   Less FB, more real life.  More focusing on Amara's Place too.

It’s going to be a good leaf.

Bitch kitties...

Fuckin' Perfect

Yeah. That.